the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Randomize
