I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
