My hair reeks of homosexuality.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
