im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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