She announced her abortion via fbk
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
