ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize