windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
