i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
