i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize