you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
