Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I deserve this hangover.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize