Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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