I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I think pants incapable of making pants work
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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