If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Randomize
