spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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