There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
