do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Randomize
