just tell him i said nine months
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
