your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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