do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
