So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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