That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
