i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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