the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
