So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
