so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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