I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I have surprise drugs for everyone
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
