Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize
