i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
