It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize