He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
