i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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