You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
