I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize