part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
