I didn't shave. On purpose
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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