so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
