brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
