Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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