i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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