Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Randomize
