Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize