She is in my trunk
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
