marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
