I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
