I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
