Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
