his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
