imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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