He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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