I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
